Words

"They've made me feel like a prisoner,

They've made me feel set free,

They've made me feel like a criminal,

Made me feel like a king."

~Words by Hawk Nelson

"They" are words and words, as insinuated above, are extremely powerful. Words can kill. Of course they can also heal. So how can we seek out healing words? Or better yet, how can we speak words of healing ourselves?

 Avoiding saying just plain stupid things can be very difficult. I mean come on, I'm sure you can think of someone that you can't stand. Now tell me, honestly, that you can spend an entire day with them without letting a single sly or rude comment escape from your lips. If you can I would be very impressed. So... the question, how do we keep ourselves from not doing just that. How we hold our tongues? The simplest answer...

Stop talking.

Now hold on a second. Say your a talkative person, that sounds impossible, even for someone who doesn't talk a lot they still can't just say nothing, ever. Well luckily for you, that's not the point. Stop talking, as I put it, doesn't mean you can't talk, it just means take a minute. Don't speak on a whim or without thinking. Allow yourself time to think or even more importantly listen before you speak. It's worth it both for you and everyone else. PLEASE... think before you speak.

Perhaps this sounds cliché, it does. I mean who hasn't heard their parents say "think before you speak" in the high mocking/teaching voice that they get. But maybe your elders have a point. Okay for those who need a little more convincing, think of a time when something mean was said to you. It's not hard, right? That's because things like this stay with us, we just can't forget all those rotten things that people say. It is one of the many curses of the human condition, we hold grudges. And even if we don't stay mad at the person who said them words can root themselves in a person's heart and take hold, whether it's true or not. It's our job to make sure that the seeds sown are good ones. Self-confidence, happiness, kindness, all things like these can be seeded just as easily as things like hate, depression, selfishness, loneliness. The main difference, though, in how these things take root in our lives is that the bad things are much more invasive; they are quick to erase other compliments and leave people in an all round bad mood. You'd know, right?

Good words can take root as easily as bad. The reason mean comments often have a stronger impact is that we will hang onto those mean things and then, because we did that, we reject compliments when they come. The answer to this, of course, is to forgive. Let the words go. It's your responsibility to let "bad" words bounce off of you without causing damage, absorb the good things, and not expect other people to do the same. Still treat other people kindly. Always. Don't expect that they'll just get over it. Believe that people will be hurt by your rude words, and don't say them. Don't say them whether you want to hurt that person or not.

Listen to people.

If you listen to people, really listen, not just sit quietly, then you can also have time before you say or do anything rashly. How do you listen? Think about it. Do you listen enough to keep up with the conversation while your mind drifts off somewhere else or do you listen? To really listen you hear that person with your soul and mind. You take in every word and process it. You sympathize with that person and you put yourself in their shoes before you go and disagree with them. Before you answer you also try to think of how they will respond to that answer, what will they think? Care. That's the most important part of listening. You don't even have to care about the topic, but care about the person. Have enough respect for another human being, with feelings and heart and soul, hopes and dreams, that you can take the time to leave your own personal thoughts and hear someone else's.

"Let my words be life
Let my words be truth
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You"

~Words by Hawk Nelson